35 Years

THERE should be no second independence referendum for at least 35 years” – Ruth Davidson

THERE should be no more Top Gear for at least 400,000 weeks.

THERE should be no Englishman winning Wimbledon for at least five hundred summers.

THERE should be no closing down sales at Allied Carpets for at least 24 hours.

THERE should be no poems about oakwoods by Andrew Motion for at least four hundred Autumn’s.

THERE should be no PR for at least ten times ten Labour Party consultative committees reporting to congress.

THERE should be no revivals of jeans with holes cut in them for at least sixty seasons.

THERE should be no second coming for at least two thousand and eighteen years.

THERE should be no second referendum on Brexit until all battles buses have completed 350 billion circumnavigations of the British Isles.

THERE should be no end to wars until we have an end to politicians who seek peace for at least their lifetime.

THERE should be no reporting of Scottish Labour’s position on differentiation until at least 55 of the 56 SNP MP’s have been removed from office.

THERE should be no suggestion Ruth Davidson is not a very impressive and, like Boris Johnson, a very amusing politician. with no connection to any nasty policies at all, until at least we read her manifesto.

THERE should be no second independence referendum until Ruth’s friends have scorched the earth and smote the saboteurs, taking back the British Empire to at least nineteen hundred and fifty five.

THERE should be no mention that the decision to hold an independence referendum has already been passed by parliament for at least every moment of the general election campaign, because there is always a reason why decisions taken in the Scottish parliament are pretendy ones.

Comments (6)

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  1. Jane Shallice says:

    Think you are mingey in just limiting it to oak trees from A. Motion

  2. Susan McLachlan says:

    Joyous!!

  3. bringiton says:

    The problem the unionist parties have is their refusal to recognise that Holyrood can act independently of Westminster.
    The Tories,in particular,do not appear to accept that the Scottish parliament represents the democratic views of the Scottish electorate and that only Westminster can decide what that is.
    Scots can only have the sort of democracy that London decides as far as they are concerned.
    I don’t think so!

  4. Big Jock says:

    Love it when minority parties get to decide what the elected government of Scotland should do! Suspect Ruth is letting Tories WM power get to her head. She is a leader of an opposition party in Scotland , who have less than half the governments elected representatives.

    She can’t help herself, sailing on the crest of an imaginary wave where the Tories won the Scottish Council elections.

  5. Elaine Fraser says:

    Talking of battle buses circumnavigating the British Isles – remember the rickshaw ‘Imperial masters’?

    Where is our battlebus ???- please oh please tell me there is one revving up somewhere – preferably a big red London double decker emblazoned with …£350m for NHS – LIE! or whatever.
    I know they are available to hire for weddings etc Lets haunt Ruth Davidson for the next four weeks . I can’t drive a bus but happy to chip in

  6. Alba woman says:

    Where will you be Ruthie baby in 35 years? Still bringing joy unto our nation? Still defending the indefensible? Still presiding over cruelty to women and children? Probably….It appears you have to get and place your kicks from something. It seems Misogny will do for a start.

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