On Abe, the Hand of God and Wonderwall
Is ABE really immature?
Possibly.
Is watching it aggravate our southern neighbours and live rent-free in their minds extremely funny?
Definitely.
England, remarkably, are in the semi-finals of the World Cup having conquered Ghana, the Congo, and an Isthmus en route. Cue onslaught of jingoism you’ve not seen since … well the last time England did this well.
Even the MoD got involved …
Norway may row. But England roars 🦁🦁🦁
Good luck tonight team, from our Armed Forces around the world! 🏴@England pic.twitter.com/CNKqy2B8ot
— Ministry of Defence 🇬🇧 (@DefenceHQ) July 11, 2026
You thought it was the British Armed Forces? Nah.
The panting, desperate demand that we are united as one – when we are patently not – is really bizarre.
First, outgoing PM Sir Keir Starmer pleads to Scotland and Wales fans to come together …
Next up (also outgoing) Scottish Secretary Douglas Alexander also pleads for Scots to get behind England …
Next up, we had BBC Scotland giving up the main story on their front page to challenging people about their views …
It seems any Scottish person who appeared in the media was immediately challenged about their position. Here’s poor Doctor Who …
Do the English media just ask every Scottish person if they will be supporting England. Fucks sake 😂 pic.twitter.com/cR1ygFuucZ
— Joe Fae Glesga (@joe_yer99) July 14, 2026
Then we had the Daily Telegraph telling everybody that they were ’embarrassing themselves’ by not supporting England …
Then, without a shred of self-reflection, and with a dose of AI slop comes the Falklands all over again (and again)…
Today, it’s England v Argentina.
The last time England faced Argentina, Margaret Thatcher sent a task force to liberate the Falklands, and the lads sent them packing. 🏴
{satire} pic.twitter.com/vqj1lri231
— Crewkerne Gazette (@CrewkerneGaz) July 15, 2026
What’s going on?
The entire apparatus of state and media being leveraged to tone police and enforce a unity that doesn’t exist has precisely the opposite effect on the Scots, Welsh, and Irish. Call us thrawn b*******, but it does.
But there’s something else.
England are in the semi-final of the World Cup. They should just be enjoying it.
Instead, they are still going on (and on) about Sixty Years of Hurt and desperately desperately demanding allegiance.
It’s a knife-edge. It’s very fragile. We are 90 minutes away from ‘Ten German Bombers’ being sung at Thomas Teuchal.
Or total glory.
But there’s also an entirely unreflective problem of all of the imagery and iconography of state and media being used to capture supposedly British institutions: the military, No 10, the BBC being entirely revealed as English institutions, then demanding our support. It’s all a bit revealing.
Yes I hope the hand of God re-appears it could be Messi but as long as Argentina win it will cement our desire for Independence. And that can only be a good thing.
You are so right, the jingoism is alive and well, but would we have been the same if in an alternative universe Scotland had been in this position and England, Wales an NI had not?
We would have been exactly the same and just as insufferable, albeit in a slightly different way. The MoD and No 10 would not have been supporting us with propaganda though.
Quite honestly, it doesn’t matter what team we Scots support, a good three thousand miles away from the “action”. Nor does it matter what team we’d prefer to win. It’s down to those guys on the pitch to determine which is the better team on the day.
That’s completely true Alan.
There is no way I’m supporting the Imperial colonisers fitba team! ABE for me!
Revealing, perhaps, yet nothing we huvny seen and heard all our lives.
Honestly, this is guff. I’m just back from Uzbekistan where, when asked, I, as always, said that I was Scottish. I’m a confident Scot – always have been. So, I have no problem supporting England tonight. Bella Caledonia – sometimes you just show a rather pathetic and insecure Caledonia. We Scots can be much better than that.
Lawrence – it’s a football match and England are our nearest and biggest rivals.
Do Hibs fans want Hearts to win?
Do Dundee fans want Dundee United to win?
Do Hibs fans demand Hearts fans support Hibs when they play?
Do Dundee fans demand Dundee United fans support Dundee when they play?
It’s what football supporters do.
I don’t dislike the English football team personally but get utterly fed up with all the media coverage which is why I would prefer England not to win World Cup.
I wouldn’t consider questioning how secure you are as a Scot however if m you think that not supporting England makes me less secure in being Scottish than you are you are bonkers.
Where does An informed Scottish football supporter stand at this juncture with England perhaps ‘ at last after continuous massive disappointments now have the opportunity to win the World Cup Again ? We ‘ try ‘ to be objective of course however we must remember that the rivalry between the two countries goes back to footballs beginning .For the uninformed Scotland’s v England is the oldest International game in the world starting about the 1870 ish . It’s been a great rivalry and we Scot’s we’re proud to introduce the passing game to England and the world . Both England and Scotland successfully intoduced the passing game to the rest of the world .As you have clearly outlined the British establishment have as ever cut across this genuine football rivalry to use it to peddle there usual jingoistic rubbish . No good luck to my English friends tonight just in that football competitive way . Thank you as ever Bella Caladonia for calling this jingoistic nonsense
There can arguably be a degree of Scottish insecurity on show when some of go out of our way to support anyone but England. But it pales to nothing compared to the insecurity of those English who expect, nay, demand the unwavering support of their neighbouring countries.
The obvious question is ‘why?’. I’m yet to hear a sensible answer to that…
Yes, there is a clear and obvious reason. I’m old enough to remember hearing Live “They think it’s all over. It is now”. How many times have I heard that clip since; certainly more that a hundred. It grates each time and I do not want another 60 years of the same.
I don’t think they do in general. They understand the rivalry as much as anyone. It is the media that gets a bee in its bonnet. Do not mistake the media for the people.
Niemand – you are spot on. The media make it the equivalent of not being a Man Utd supporter but having to watch the football on Man Utd tv channel.
It really is a pity that we Have VAR. What a delight it would be if we had another “Hand of God”
I’m just fed up with English NHS stories, English weather, English politics and now English football on BBC breakfast. There is other nations where things happen but of course they are of no interest to English audiences
Sometimes in my more serene and humble moments I think I should be that bigger person and park my ‘chippy Jock’ pettiness….But then you see and hear all this jingoistic oppressive vomit-inducing bollocks, and you’re immediately shaken out of any weakness and remember what you stand for, and what they stand for…..ABE, ABE, ABE, every time, all day long, and twice on Sundays!
Agreed, All of the Above.
I’m quite frank with my English siss-in-law and my two half-Scots nephews… England play Alone, with no support from Scottish, Welsh or Irish fans, worth a damn.
They have culturally appropriated the Union Jack for too long, calling that flag, English. They have taken the P… for too long, and nobody worth a damn on the European Continent is in the least bit deceived, they know we are not English. And that English Sovereignty and Misrule has subjugated our three nations’ rights
We are Scots. Irish, Welsh. And very proud of our heritage, especially because, we know we propped up the English Empire, now, perhaps, we are living to regret it.
Hm, but ABE is also jingoism 😉
BBC? Well they were pretty much behind Scotland’s efforts in the World Cup too, until there was no point.
Overall, I am a bit puzzled why any of this bothers anyone. Football rivalry goes way beyond any sense of fairness, kindness, camaraderie or whatever – I want every team apart from the ones I support to lose, every time, unless they have no bearing at all, and never have, on the teams I support. Scotland fans supporting England, or vice versa? Why?
Um……………………I’m supporting …er……..always would support ANYONE playin’ agin’ The Auld Enemy..why?… cos basically ah hate them..300years of theft and abuse and noo they’re comin ‘up here in droves…..How’s aboot we have a squad o’ trained haggis tae sniff oot the foreign english turds .as they cross the border….an’ bite their asses? We don’t have to kill them. ( I’m a humanitarian..sorta)…just a wee bit o’ maiming would suffice ..that should focus their minds…
Oh did ah mention Ah’m supportin’ Argentina?
Excellent article demonstrating the fallibility o’ the foreign english when they have to keep askin’ if we support them….somebody tell them….they are FOREIGNERS…got it foreign english person?
For OUR Scotland and her supporting Argentina weans..
When I worked in Manchester during a WC which Scotland didn’t qualify for I was asked who I was supporting when England played Argentina. I replied I wouldn’t support England and explained that Scotland see England as our biggest rivals. I quizzed my colleagues who were Man City fans whether they would support Msn Utd in Europe especially when they had to watch it all on Man Utd tv. They did sort of get it and just accepted that I wouldn’t support England. It didn’t affect our friendship and was something we could have a laugh about from time to time.
If,god forbid , they win the cup does Scotland get a bank holiday?!!!