Yoke Mates of Destruction

The unelected Prime Minister arrived in the country today and began lying and lying. He first claimed that Labour have done a deal with the SNP  and second that they’d hold a referendum next year. Both of these claims are untrue. 

He told reporters in that he would not grant the powers for a second independence referendum regardless of whether the SNP wins majority of seats in this election or win a pro-independence Holyrood majority in 2021.

Which is odd. And indefensible.

He described Nicola Sturgeon and Jeremy Corbyn as “yoke-mates of destruction” in terms of their threat to the future of the UK, inadvertently launching a mass new t-shirt brand.

His aim was to right the unsteady path of his wavering election campaign, offset by a slew of disastrous lies, contemptuous attitudes and scandals tumbling out of the Tory closet so fast the general public couldn’t keep up.

His launch, only yesterday, was described as a ‘sewer of lies’:

“He cleared his throat, punched his palms into the lectern and threw open the sluice gates. The lies poured forth like open sewage, or a catastrophic explosion at the start of a disaster movie. Out they tumbled at such speed it was impossible to know where one began and one ended. At times, actual, self-contained lies could be made out, like bodies on the current of a deadly river. At others, the lies had coagulated to form a kind of very slow-cooked bulls**t casserole, the false meat and the untrue gravy forming a kind of unctuous slop.”

Here he was much swifter.

The format is now well-worn. Pick obscure rural setting. Arrive in secrecy avoiding all of the general public, denounce elected politicians, cancel democracy, spout about the “Awesome Foursome”, then leave.

The optics, as they say, were not good. But Boris probably doesn’t want to spend much time up here.

Meanwhile the idea that the Conservative campaign in Scotland is a survivable event is draining away down his sewer of lies.



Comments (9)

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  1. squigglypen says:

    surely…ditch of lies?

  2. Charles L. Gallagher says:

    Mike, now I’m not a violent man but as I look around the world, Catalonia, Hong Kong being recent cases which demonstrate what happens when legitimate claims of people’s right to govern themselves are ignored how easy it is to rapidly spiral downwards to violence. Johnson is the product of an English Public School education system that teaches the false claim of their inalienable right to rule. What a pity that he was not taught to learn the lessons of history which are staring him in the face as he wrestled with the NI problem, a product of this same supremacist attitude stretching back to the sixteenth century.

    1. Yes the position is untenable. I think its a bluff. In face of (renewed) mandates in both parliaments it will be completely unviable to maintain this.

  3. Robbie says:

    DUP,and Irish Jig swiftly come too mind

  4. John Docherty says:

    Please stop using the archaic name of public school when referring to the institutions requiring fee paying that are Private school.
    It’s part of their dishonesty that shouldn’t be facilitated.

  5. James Mills says:

    As you say , Mike , Johnson sneaks in to Scotland , squeaks plaintively, then sneaks out again . Does anyone in his campaign team really believe that this cowardly tactic will win over swing voters or even convince his own Tory voters that he is THE MAN ?
    It is totally absurd to continually diss Scottish voters and expect them to swing behind him .
    More evidence , I fear , the man and his close advisers don’t give a f*ck for Scotland , its people and even his own Tory voters !

    1. I dont think anything about his visit is based on a Scottish audience

  6. Chris Ballance says:

    Och, it wasn’t all lies, Mike. I heard him say on the BBC “only the Conservatives care about our precious union.” Well, the Lib/Dems will sacrifice any policy for a ha’penny of power, Labour doesn’t know what it thinks and The Greens and SNP oppose the union. So, yep, I think he’s quite right- he’s on his own there.

    1. Alasdair Macdonald says:

      Chris Ballance, I have to disagree with you. Mr Johnson and his clique are only interested in preserving the ‘precious union’ for as long as it continues to shower shedloads of money into their privatised coffers. Once that stops, because a sufficient number of the local populace have said, “Stoap! Nae merr!!”, then they will fight a destructive war before eventually leaving, claiming a victory. The purpose of the war will have been to destroy the local economy, principally, out of baleful, racist spite, but secondly, to destroy any competition to businesses in their heartland. That was the story of the slow break up of the Empire. Apart from Canada, and, to some extent, Australia and New Zealand, all the rest suffered pretty grievously, with lasting factionalism built into many societies as legacies of the divide and rule tactics of colonisation. In Australia and New Zealand, the indigenous populations suffered pretty badly, and Australia started off pretty much as a slave society penal colony, for people like Thomas Muir and the Tolpuddle Martyrs for daring to challenge authority. Canada was not without oppression in its development, but seems – Quebec apart – to have resolved things fairly humanely.

      If any party is the party of the previous union, it is Labour.

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