Dead Man Laughing


He’s got away with it, again, hasn’t he? Posturing as being open and honest and contrite the Prime Minister bluffed his way out of his latest crisis with little bother. He put his sad face and thanked everyone as they told him to resign.

Sir Keir Starmer had a go. He was concise and brutal, and trotted out his one-liner ‘the party’s over’. He landed a few punches. Ian Blackford tried but isn’t really very effective.

There are two or three problems with the process of deposing an obviously useless and corrupt leader.

The first is that despite all the sound and fury and chatter the media’s kind of useless. They’re all part of the same political elite. The ‘lobby’ is neutered and ineffectual and full of gossip from inside the Westminster bubble – and the alternative media isn’t strong enough (yet).

The second is that there’s very little in the actual system that is functional to call people to account. The ‘Ministerial Code’ is completely useless and the lack of any process of impeachment (or equivalent) means that sleaze and illegal behavior just slides away (every ******* time).

The third is that the opposition appeals to a set of standards or principles that don’t exist. If you appeal to the Tories sense of what’s ‘right’ or ‘decent’ you have a category error. These people aren’t operating by any sort of moral compass. Starmer asked: “Is he so contemptuous of the British people that he thinks he can just ride this out?” Yes Sir Keir 100% he is, 100%.

So Boris is very very sorry and he’s appointed someone he employs to investigate the whole thing.

Finally despite media efforts to talk up Liz Truss (who comes over like a likeable but extremely stupid Labrador) or fluff Rishi Sunak (a man who is so privileged he makes David Cameron look like he’s had a tough life) or Michael Gove (there’s nothing to say here that can possibly describe how awful he is) – these aren’t very good alternatives. Imagine being in a political party that had a leader so appalling on every level as Boris Johnson and you DIDN’T have anyone better to go to as an alternative?

The political power and authority may have oozed out of Johnson on live television today but it doesn’t matter. Johnson is undefeatable because there’s nothing to defeat. If there’s no honour to defend there is no fall from grace. And the focusing on the personality politics of the pantomime blinds us to the deeper crisis unfolding here, the crisis of the British state and its key institutions. This is a Dead Man Laughing not a Dead Man Walking.

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Comments (21)

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  1. Marybel Tracey says:

    Agreed 100%. The whole thing is a complete sham. No honesty ,no backbone , no morals nothing redeeming about the whole Westminster debacle . I have often wondered would anything be gained by a mass walk out of SNP MPs in protest. Seinn Fein refused to enter parliament despite being elected. Thoughts?

    1. Hi Marybel – yeah I recently explored that a bit, see here: https://bellacaledonia.org.uk/2021/12/26/all-yellow/

      1. Marybel Tracey says:

        Ah yes I see. Thank you for the heads up. I must admit I don’t read all the posts as some go over my head or simply don’t interest me. I am very interested how this latest debacle plays out……but you are right about the alternatives. Will the country see the light and vote the conservatives out as they should never have voted them in in the first place …… but is there a credible opposition …..No! Roll on independence !

  2. Cathie Lloyd says:

    Truss as an overenthusiastic Labrador (or maybe spaniel?) is perfect

    1. Jim says:

      My wee spaniel is very smart lol

    2. Derek Thomson says:

      But “likeable”? Not in this household.

  3. Squigglypen says:

    Brilliant article..so cruel..and absolutely on the mark.
    Blackford..he’s got no chance among those toleys.
    Gove..knock need..said it before ..you obviously don’t listen!

    There’s only one answer..Independence. Any Scot who doesn’t understand that should be sent to live in England and not allowed to return..that’ll larn them.

    More cruel articles please..I do so like them!

    1. H. Neary says:

      I truly wish you all the best this time round.
      I was born in England in 1955 and spent my life there. After the referendum I used the family history to get my EU citizenship.
      I look from Ireland at the antics of Bozo and his cabal and am thankful for every day since I departed.

      You will have quite a fight though methinks. The Tories backed with their gutter press will do everything to keep you entwined. The porkies about England financing Scotland will be designed to instil fear and dependence, just like the Brexit lies.

      Just remember, nothing peddled as a result of lies benefitted the “punter”.
      Well except maybe Santa, but that’s debatable!

  4. Cameron Fraser says:

    Big, bombastic, buffoonish Boris may be laughing but the rest of the country isn’t.
    What I cannot understand is people interviewed on television who say they would vote for this unprincipled liar AGAIN!
    What really isn’t so funny is the ineffective opposition parties who can stamp their feet and wring their hands but do very little else.
    Is this what we deserve?

    1. H. Neary says:

      Well why not?
      Bozo’s history was just lies, cowardice and incompetence before the election, so what’s changed?
      Why should the poor eejits vote differently, they know no better.

      Of course those with advanced thinking ability that have succeeded in mastering challenging tasks like potty training and using a spoon might wonder what the point is of giving power to a compulsive liar, let alone an incompetent one.

      Alas the answer to that question is totally beyond me also.

      I like Scotland, the deep philosophical questions dont arise if you shun the Tories.

  5. Robbie says:

    And to think this is the P***k who can say yea or nay to a referendum ,Wastemonster has Sunk to the lowest Depths and they don’t give a shit what anyone thinks about them . Agree with Sqiggleypen any Scot who does not want Independence should be sent south of the border for good.

  6. Axel P Kulit says:

    If Johnson can trigger an election should there be a Tory effort to remove him then, as the party is so unpopular, they unlikely to try.

  7. Derek says:

    There was a weird on on the radio earlier; a tory MP who claimed that he’d sent his letter to the 1922 Committee, but wouldn’t say to the reporter that the P.M. should resign.

    Come 6pm, I wondered whether it’d be the P.M. or Prince Sex Pest* that was the top story.

    *allegedly

  8. gavinochiltree says:

    Desperate DRossie, dropping in the polls, has walked the plank, all by himself (expect Ruthless was pushing him), and is now in a kind of limbo.
    If Johnson sticks , and I expect the Tories to give him till May, then DRossie is in trouble.
    He is not Davidson. Without her balls, media support and ego.
    Downing Street doesn’t think it needs a “strong man” in Scotland–DRossie wouldn’t be that man anyway.
    None of his fellow Scottish Tory MP’s followed him, the supposed Leader.
    This is why there will be no “split” from London.
    DRoss will lose the locals heavily, and find himself in the same position as Davidson, though without the prospect of a Peerage.

  9. gavinochiltree says:

    Nae luck Andra’, the Right Royal leg-humpin’ Prince and all round cad is about to meet the gutter.
    In the Good ol’ Days, Royalty could shag the whatever peasantry took their fancy.

    Check out Prince George, who numbered men and women among his conquests, a drug user and, like his brother, Nazi supporter, whose death and inquest papers have totally disappeared—he may have had a girlfriend on the flight, and may have been flying the craft.
    He was attempting to broker a deal between Britain and Germany, with the help of many Tory MPs, Aristocracy, press barons and of course, the Royal family.

    Or Lord Mountbatten (nickname Mountbottom), a man with the lowest morals of any royal, ever. He shagged anything and everything and wife wife was of the same disposition. In India he sent servants out to bring back boys of 8 or 9 for sex, had “parties” in boarding schools with his perverted friends, and yet was feted throughout his life by people who know all about his predilections.
    He was Prince Charlies favourite Uncle.

    Yup Andrew has had a “bum” deal.

    1. Squigglypen says:

      Love yer cruel response…thocht about writing’ a wee book ….or a big ane….???

    2. J Galt says:

      Well eventually even Mountbatten became too much of a liability – Andy would be well advised to avoid yachts for the time being!

  10. Niemand says:

    Can’t help feeling that for all those who want to see the Tories seriously scuppered, for whatever reason (independence, desire for a Labour government, simply a better country medium term), should welcome the idea of Johnson surviving. As Andy Zaltzman joked the other day all you have to do is wait and Johnson will inevitably bring about total chaos and the more chaos the more people will turn against them. The only problem is in how much damage he/they do in the mean time.

    I thought it interesting that Ross was unequivocal in his condemnation. Clearly self-preservation for Scottish Tories.

  11. @ SleepingDog says:

    I don’t know about the first (although the competition between suppliers in the information marketplace that is ‘the media’ does seem far from free, which skews the aggregation of truth as an expression of the general will), but you’re bang on the money with regard to the other two ‘problems’.

    1. We don’t elect our government ministers; they’re appointed by our head of state, who is only democratically constrained in this choice by the need to secure a majority among our elected representatives. Thus, the only way we can remove a prime minister from office is to vote collectively against her/his partisans in a general election in order to ensure that they can’t subsequently constitute that majority.

    2. The moral standards or principles to which we still often appeal in holding our rulers to account are dead; they no longer carry any authority. The compass by which we steer our public affairs is no longer (and probably never has been) a moral one; those affairs are guided by amoral expediency or a now naked ‘will to power’. The exposure of ‘sleaze’, hypocrisy and the like no longer impresses anyone in our political discourse; few voters now expect anything different of their rulers; it’s become an intrinsic part of our politics itself. Ironically, despite the moral ambivalence his behaviour as a celebrity has always evoked in us, Boris remains as popular as the villains in any soap opera or reality TV show.

    Anyway, the Conservative Party has a decision to make. Does it replace Boris as its leader now, to give a new leader a couple of years to bed in before the next election, or does it stick with him in the hope that his roguish populism again carries the day with the UK electorate as spectacularly as it did in 2019?

    It might be more expedient for the Scottish independentistas in securing the anti-Tory vote in Scotland for the cause of their will to power if the Conservative Party in the UK decided to stick with him.

    1. @ Bella Caledonia Editor says:

      Sorry, that last post should be addressed to ‘Bella Caledonia Editor’.

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